Broken

Imagine a beautiful Spanish woman who is the best flamenco dancer in all of Spain. She is tall, alluring, graceful and sensual. Her dance calls to you from afar, calling you closer and closer still. But not only is she beautiful she is a very jealous - demanding dancer. One that requires your constant attention and dedication. She is both beautiful and dangerous. That is the Camino. Today I sat by a river and wept not from the beauty but from the betrayal. She betrayed me and I have betrayed myself. Today was the day of not one step more. Apparently in Spain when they say flat they mean flat compared to mountains. So 800 meter climbs and their equal downs all day. It was just too much. So the questions came... Why am I here? What do I hope to accomplish? Who am I competing with? So a decision needs to be made: do I keep up with the sprint across Spain doing 18 miles a day for a total of 500 miles? Or do I do the last 300 miles slowly and walk to the sea? Have I failed myself? Have I failed you? God? I have broken.. my Spanish dancer has betrayed me and I have betrayed myself.

Note: Pack wins the day again. I think it´s smarter than me in many ways.